Save the Date Etiquette and When to Send Save the Dates: From the Experts!

All About Save the Dates From Bliss & Bone

Save the Date cards are not, in the strictest sense, necessary elements for your wedding planning process, these cards can provide added help for your guests in alerting them about your upcoming wedding ceremony and reception. Knowing when to send save the date cards for wedding celebrations can allow you to provide plenty of advance notice of your wedding plans.

Since guests spend an average of just under $1,000 for each wedding they attend, making things easier on your friends and loved ones can help them to have a wonderful time at your once-in-a-lifetime wedding celebration. 

At Bliss & Bone, we make it easy to design elegant online or printed Save the Dates and wedding invitations. This guide will answer many of the most frequently asked questions about Save the Date etiquette and timing to help you make the best decisions for your upcoming wedding day celebration.

What Is a Save the Date?

Save the Date cards are usually the first notification that most guests receive regarding your wedding. Save the Dates for your wedding can be matched to your invitations and other elements of your wedding stationery suite and website to ensure that the first impression you make on your guests is a positive one.

What Info Goes on the Save the Date?

Your Save the Date should contain basic information on the date, city in which your wedding will take place and the names of you and your partner. This official announcement can feature backgrounds and images that complement or match your wedding invitation and wedding website perfectly. If you have a wedding website, you can also include the URL on your Save the Dates.

Save the Date etiquette dictates that some information should not be included on your Save the Date cards. The time of your wedding and the venue you have chosen should be saved for the official wedding invitation. Wedding registry information should be reserved for your wedding website or for a card inserted into your wedding invitation according to proper invitation and Save the Date etiquette.

Do You Have to Send Save the Dates?

Save the Dates are not absolutely necessary. They do offer a number of benefits for you and your partner, including the ability to request email addresses from those you plan to invite. This can allow you to send digital wedding invitations, which can help you manage printing and postage costs when sending invites to your friends and family.

A Save the Date card can also prevent your guests from missing your wedding because they had made other plans for the same date. By letting your guests know the date of your wedding as soon as possible, you can reduce the chance that your friends or family members will have made conflicting plans.

If you do not choose to send a Save the Date card, however, you should send your wedding invitations earlier to compensate for the lack of advance notice for your guests. This can help you to ensure that the people you love will be able to share this special day with you.

Are Save the Dates really necessary? In most cases, these early notifications to friends and family can be well worth the small cost in time and money. You and your partner can decide if Save the Dates are right for your wedding and for the guests you plan to invite.

Do You Have to Send Save the Dates to Everyone?

While Save the Dates should be sent as early as possible, they should only be sent to those you intend to invite to your wedding and not to everyone you know. Since only invited guests will actually need to save the date, hurt feelings could result if a Save the Date card is not followed up with an official invitation. Deciding on your guest list and sending Save the Dates only to those you want to attend can allow you to avoid these situations to create a better experience for everyone on your special day.

The experts at EmilyPost.com emphasize that you must send invitations to everyone who receives a Save the Date. Many couples agree that this is one of the most challenging aspects of planning the wedding. Budget aside, you’d probably love to celebrate with as many people as possible! But when you factor in costs and feasibility for your venue, you need to narrow it down to a select few. 

So, how do you decide on the exact number of guests? You and your partner can work with a planner or the venue coordinator to determine what number works best for your budget. From there, you can divide the guest list in half, or save a set for your parents to invite. Either way, Save the Date etiquette is crucial here, so make sure all of your invited guests receive one. 

Save the Date vs Invitation: What Is the Difference?

The simple answer to this question is that a Save the Date conveys minimal information about the date and city in which you plan to get married. By contrast, a wedding invitation offers detailed information about the venues, times and expected attire for both the wedding ceremony and reception. The difference between a Save the Date vs invitation can best be illustrated by the weight and size of a single Save the Date postcard compared with the average mailed wedding invitation. The wedding invite is heavier and contains more information in comparison to a simple and light Save the Date.

Your wedding invitation might also come with more elements than a Save the Date. Whether you choose to send them out via email or through the mail, your invites could also include details about other events held before or after the wedding day. And if you are sending printed invites, you will also want to add in a pre-stamped and addressed reply envelope and card for your guests. These are significantly different pieces in your stationery, but they work in tandem to give your guests all of the details they need to prepare for your big day. Advice for invites are similar to what’s provided for Save the Date etiquette, so make sure you stay consistent with your stationery.

Can You Send an Online Save the Date?

Paperless wedding invitations and Save the Dates are accepted ways to contact your prospective guests and to let them know about your upcoming nuptials. Paperless Save the Date etiquette generally follows the same guidelines as those for printed Save the Date cards and other elements of your wedding communications.

At Bliss & Bone, we offer an easy-to-use interface that allows you to create elegant printed Save the Dates, online Save the Dates or a combination of both types of Save the Dates. We make it simple and fun to create matching designs for all your wedding stationery suite, including your website, paperless wedding invites, printed invitations and, of course, your Save the Date cards.

When deciding between paperless, printed or a mixture of both types of Save the Dates, you and your partner should consider whether most of your guests are likely to have email. Sending printed Save the Dates and requesting email addresses from those guests who have them can allow you to determine the approximate number of printed invitations you will need to invite everyone on your guest list. By sending your invites digitally, you can save money on the cost of printed wedding invitations to help you manage the budget for your wedding more effectively.

In addition to the costs involved in creating a paper versus digital Save the Date, couples often gravitate toward the latter because it’s better for the environment, too. If making eco-friendly decisions is important to you and your partner, this is one area where you can save paper. You can talk it all through with your partner, but it’s important to know that choosing to go digital does not compromise your Save the Date etiquette. More and more etiquette experts are weighing in and saying that this is a perfectly acceptable method in the modern age.

How Much Do Save the Date Cards Cost?

With weddings costing an average of nearly $34,000, the cost of your Save the Date cards is unlikely to make a major dent in your overall wedding budget.

Paperless Save the Dates are considerably less expensive than comparable printed versions. These types of Save the Date notifications may not have the same tangible appeal as printed cards that can be saved in a planner or taped to the refrigerator. Consider the reaction of your invited guests before deciding on paperless or printed Save the Dates for your upcoming wedding celebration.

When to Send Save the Dates

In general, you'll want to send your save the dates 6-12 months before your wedding. If your wedding is local and most of your guests are local, 6 months could be sufficent time for your guests to plan. However, if you're having a destination event where most of the people are traveling, consider sending a save the date out up to 12 months in advance. Overall, when to send save the dates is up to you and when you are ready with the information for your guests. If you have the date and location set, that's all the information you need to send out your save the dates - so send them! Your guests will appreciate the added time to plan.

If you are not sure when to send Save the Date cards, a few factors will typically affect your wedding planning timeline. These guidelines can help you to determine when to send Save the Dates in a variety of circumstances:

• Destination weddings: You and your partner may be wondering when to send Save the Dates for destination wedding celebrations. Because these exotic locations are typically far from home for both you and your guests, additional time will be required to make all the arrangements involved in planning your wedding and we recommend sending out save the dates as soon as you can. Your guests will also require added time to make travel plans and to book accommodations at the destination of your dream wedding.
• Printed invitations and Save the Dates: If you are planning to send printed Save the Date cards, you will need to allow added time for the postal service to deliver these notifications to your guests. For guests who live in the same country, allow an extra week or two for your Save the Dates to arrive at their homes.
• Guests from foreign countries: It is important to remember that guests living outside the country may have significant delays in postal services. This can be an important factor for you and your partner if you are wondering, "When should save the dates be mailed?" Delays for mailing printed wedding invitations could be even longer thanks to the increased weight of these items and slower transit times that could result. If you need support for foreign languages for your website, invitation or Save the Date, Bliss & Bone offers these services as part of our overall array of options for your wedding.
• Paperless Save the Dates: If you opt for a digital Save the Date, you can typically wait a week or two before sending these notices. Save the Dates sent by email arrive nearly immediately, which can provide you with some valuable breathing room when planning your wedding.

These guidelines on when to send save the dates can help you manage all the most important items on your wedding planning checklist in a timely way. At Bliss & Bone, we offer practical help in figuring out when to send save the dates in a wide range of situations and how to manage the timing for Save the Date cards for everyone on your guest list. This can ensure that you stick to the rules of Save the Date etiquette for your upcoming wedding reception and ceremony.

Elements of Save the Date Etiquette

Creating a cohesive look and feel for your Save the Dates, wedding invitations and wedding website can produce the most positive impression on the friends and family members you invite to your wedding. Save the Date etiquette can provide a framework for timing and design for your Save the Dates, wedding invites and wedding website. Some of the most important points to remember for Save the Date etiquette are listed here:

• Proper Save the Date etiquette for addressing: It is not necessary to send individual Save the Dates to multiple guests within a single household. It is important, however, to address your Save the Dates in a way that indicates who is invited. If you plan to exclude children under a certain age, for instance, making that clear on your Save the Date and wedding invitation can make it easier for your guests to plan effectively to attend your celebration.
• Transportation and accommodation arrangements: If you are planning to offer transportation or have reserved a block of hotel rooms for your guests, it is acceptable to include this information on your Save the Date to assist the friends and family members on your guest list. While formal Save the Date etiquette may restrict this information to the official wedding invitation, you are the final judge of what will provide the best options for your guests.
• Timing for Save the Dates: Even if some aspects of your wedding plans might change, it is important to send Save the Dates as soon as you have decided on a city and a date for your wedding. You can also request RSVP information by linking to your wedding website, which can be set up to accept digital responses to your printed or paperless wedding invitations. If you are not sure when to send Save the Dates, a good rule of thumb is to send them as soon as possible once your plans are generally in place.
• Linking to your wedding website: While it is not recommended to include your registry details, per traditional Save the Date etiquette rules, you can do so in a more subtle way by mentioning your wedding website URL. Within your wedding website, you can connect your wedding registry. This way, you’re not directing guests to your registry, but you are allowing them the opportunity to navigate there themselves. Your wedding website can also add more details that you might not be able to fit into your Save the Dates, including transportation and lodging suggestions, photos and more.
• What to leave out: Including key information about your wedding date and location is essential to achieve the desired results with your Save the Dates. Including information about your wedding registry on your Save the Date, however, is still frowned upon by authorities in Save the Date etiquette. You can also save the reply cards for later. Save the Date etiquette does not include asking guests to reply back with a RSVP. Save the Dates are sent out to let guests know about the key details of your wedding, and you don’t need to ask about their availability quite yet. 

If you are working with a wedding planner to create the wedding of your dreams, this professional may offer guidance on when to send Save the Dates and wedding invitations. This can help you stay on the right side of wedding etiquette while planning your wedding reception and ceremony.

Save the Date Etiquette Wording Ideas and Examples

There are plenty of dos and don’ts to follow when it comes to Save the Date etiquette wording. This is one of the most important elements of your Save the Date etiquette, and there are quite a few ways to follow the “rules” while also staying true to yourself and your partner. 

As we mentioned earlier, Save the Date etiquette wording has some must-haves. These include your and your partner’s names, date and the city where your wedding is happening. Unlike wedding invitations, you can have a little fun with this more informal piece of stationery. Here are some examples of Save the Date etiquette approved wording that are super unique:

Save the Date Etiquette Text Example #1: 

Save Our Weekend

05

22

23

Helena and Michelle

Wilsons Creek

New South Wales

This is a simple way to tell your guests to prepare for a weekend packed with festivities. It has all of the essential pieces of information, but really focuses on the date.

Save the Date Etiquette Text Example #2: 

Adrian & Bridgette are madly in love.

They are getting married.

Save the Date

November 20, 2023

Delray Beach, Florida

If you want to follow Save the Date etiquette guidelines and share how excited you are to marry the love of your life, this is your answer. You’re madly in love, and you’re tying the knot. What’s more perfect than declaring exactly that?

Save the Date Etiquette Text Example #3: 

SG

03 13 22 

Save the Date

Sasha and Grayson

Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Why not combine your first initials? Later on in this Save the Date, you will see that the couple’s names (Sasha and Grayson) are clearly stated. So, it goes with proper Save the Date etiquette, while also mixing up the standard text formatting. 

Save the Date Etiquette Text Example #4: 

SAVE THE DATE

friday, the sixth of october

two thousand twenty three

los angeles

POPPY and AIDEN

If you truly want to follow Save the Date etiquette, you can dig into the details of how the date should be spelled out. Formal wedding invitations often feature words rather than numbers for the date and time of the event. By following suit in your Save the Dates, you can add a touch of formality to your design. That being said, this idea is slightly more casual and modern with the lower-case text.

Save the Date Etiquette Text Example #5: 

Save the Date for

The Wedding of

Astrid and Brandon

Saturday, May Sixteenth

Two Thousand Twenty Three

Chicago, Illinois 

Formal invitation to follow

This example follows classic Save the Date etiquette by spelling out the date and featuring all of the important details. It also takes it one step further by clarifying that guests can anticipate a more formal invitation in the near future. 

Save the Date etiquette is not only important for following traditional “rules” outlined for your wedding day, but it can also provide a framework that makes your process easier. With clear guidelines, some couples are grateful and relieved to know the standard for most Save the Dates and how they should be worded. If you fall into this group, you can use these suggestions and examples to your benefit. However, if you do not align with these recommendations, do not feel obligated to use them. Talk it out with your partner and decide on the wording that works best for your event.

Save the Date Etiquette Addressing

A big part of Save the Date etiquette is how you address your friends and family members. Depending on your guests’ respective living situations, relationship statuses and even career paths, you want to ensure that you show them respect with Save the Date etiquette addressing. In this section, we will provide examples for every guest and how they should be addressed on the envelope or email. 

Traditionally, Save the Dates are sent out through the mail. But it is becoming more common to send out Save the Dates via email. However you choose to design them, Save the Date etiquette addressing applies to both styles. 

Here is what to remember about Save the Date etiquette and addressing your loved ones: 

• If your guests are individuals: If you are inviting an individual to your wedding, Save the Date etiquette addressing is simple. You only need to include their full name and title. (Read on for more details about Save the Date etiquette for addressing if your guest has a distinguished title). Plus, you will also need to follow these Save the Date etiquette addressing rules if you are inviting families with children over the age of 18. 
• If your guests are individuals with a plus one: There are two main options for couples planning to give a plus one to an individual guest. If you know who the plus one is, you can write out your primary guest’s full name and title, and then include their plus one’s name on the second line. And if you are simply giving the individual a plus one but do not have a specific name, this is what the Save the Date etiquette addressing will look like: The full name and title of the individual, followed by “and Guest.” This will signal that your family member or friend has the freedom to bring a date to your wedding.
• If your guests are a family: Let’s say you are inviting a married couple who share the same last name and their two children, ages 10 and 12. Because the children are under the age of 18, you can group the family together and send out only one invitation for all of them. To follow Save the Date etiquette for addressing, you should include both parents’ titles (Mr. and Mrs.) followed by the father’s full name. From there, you can include the children’s names below. If the children were over the age of 18, you should prepare to send out individual invitations to each of them (even if they live in the same home as their parents or each other). 
• If your guests are a couple: If you need to send out an invitation to two friends who are married and share the same last name, you can follow the rules above (ignoring the part where you feature their children’s names). And if no one has changed their last name, you can write out their titles and full names. For couples who are not married but live together, you should write out their titles and full names on two separate lines. If your friends or relatives recently got engaged, you want to do your due diligence and figure out if they plan on changing their names. For example, one couple might get excited to see “The Future Mr. and Mrs.” on the envelope, while others would not feel understood. To follow Save the Date etiquette for addressing properly, try and communicate with newly engaged couples.
• If your guests have a distinguished title: For guests who are doctors, in the military or other fields that come with distinguished titles, you need to be careful about how you address them. Titles should be spelled out, so you will fully write out “Doctor,” “Colonel” and any other title your guest holds. These people have earned their distinguished titles, so it is crucial that you address them accordingly. 

Also, if you and your partner have always dreamed of an adult-only wedding, that is perfectly acceptable among Save the Date etiquette experts. However, it is up to you to address your guests properly, so there is no confusion. You can also double-down on the request by featuring it in the FAQ page of your wedding website. For instance, one question could be “Are children invited?” From there, you can respond by explaining that your wedding is only for adults over the age of 18. When in doubt, remember that adding more information is always more helpful for your guests.

Understanding Save the Date etiquette when you address your invites is beyond important. It is a sign of respect and the most welcoming and thoughtful way to kick off your wedding invitations. Consider these recommendations as you design your Save the Dates and their corresponding emails or envelopes. 

Deciding on the Design of Your Save the Date Cards

You can find inspiration for the design of Save the Dates, wedding invites and wedding websites from the examples on Bliss & Bone. Our website offers some outstanding examples of the best themes, backgrounds and fonts for your Save the Date. Some of our most popular options include the following:

• Nothing but flowers: Matching your Save the Date card with your wedding flowers can allow you to explore floral themes for your wedding stationery. You can implement these themes to create a matching website, matching floral wedding invites and many other elements of your wedding communications suite.
• A green-friendly approach: Selecting tropical and green foliage as the background for all your wedding communications can allow you to create a cohesive and pulled together look for every aspect of your dream wedding.
• Stark and regal: Architectural designs offer a minimalist sensibility for your wedding invite and Save the Date. By using the same simple design for all your wedding stationery, you can create the most positive impression on your guests while letting them know what to expect on the big day.

At Bliss & Bone, we offer an extensive array of Save the Date examples that can guide your own creative process. By working hand-in-hand with your partner, you can create the perfect Save the Date and wedding invite for your once-in-a-lifetime wedding celebration.

The Wedding Invitation and Save the Date Experts at Bliss & Bone

Bliss & Bone offers an array of services that are ideally suited for your one-of-a-kind wedding day. From unique wedding websites with custom URLs to the most elegant and beautiful Save the Dates, we provide you with the tools you need to plan your wedding more effectively and to let your guests know of your plans. To learn more about Save the Date options, email us at hello@blissandbone.com or contact us online for more information and personalized assistance. At Bliss & Bone, we are here to help you create the wedding you and your partner have always wanted in the most convenient way possible.